Just when I thought that I could make an early-June recovery and continue with my summer plans feeling better than ever, my health took a turn, with a few conditions colliding to great the perfect internal storm. Instead of enjoying summer at the beach or working toward my goal of being more active and healthy, I've spent the last month on the couch, binge-watching The Vampire Diaries (a pretty good series, as it turns out) and reading book after book -- that is, when I wasn't in doctor's offices and hospitals getting poked, prodded, and scanned.
Over the past few days, I've been feeling much better, but I'm still in need of answers, and am awaiting further tests. There's so much waiting involved. I just want to deal with everything NOW, and have it behind me. It's been very stressful, but it's also helped me to realize more than ever what matters in life and what doesn't. It's so easy to take good health for granted, because when we're healthy, we're healthy -- it's just the norm. We may not even realize how good feeling good feels, until we don't feel that way any longer. When we're not healthy, and aren't sure if we will ever return to being healthy again, it can actually be terrifying, and destabilizing, and exhausting.
As you might imagine, my creativity has been at an all-time low, but because deadlines are still deadlines, I've had to push through, and although I might have approached my most recent projects grudgingly, it turns out that having a creative escape can be quite therapeutic. For a few moments, I stopped worrying about my body and focused instead on something other than my anxieties.
I'm sad to say, I've given up on ICAD. I was back on track for a while there, but I just couldn't keep up with it. Here are the last few cards that I completed. Maybe next summer I'll be up to the challenge.
Here's hoping your summer has been far more enjoyable than mine!